If you wonder why you struggle to feel grateful, you have a lot of company. Many people strive to feel grateful, but still wind up not experiencing this all-too-elusive emotion or feeling. If you want to learn more about how to have this feeling, read this week’s thoughts on the subject.

The Struggle to Feel Grateful is One of the Greatest of Our Time

If ever there was a time when people had difficulty with feeling gratitude, it is the present. At no time have we ever been led to believe that there are so many things that we need to have in our lives to feel happy and content. It leaves us all grasping for more and more, and gives us little time to stop and appreciate what we have. There’s so much focus on interfacing with our smartphones that you get all absorbed in that and forget to take time to just be and appreciate the present moment.

The Struggle to Feel Grateful Starts and Ends in Our Brains

One of the books that I have recently been fortunate enough to hear about has been Jill Bolte Taylor’s Whole Brain Living. In this book, she talks about four different parts of our brains, which largely explain the different functions of each of these different parts. One part of our brain, called the right emotional brain, is very focused on all the things we lack and need to be fearful of in our lives. It tends to focus on how we can attain more and more despite any obvious lack. It is an important and valuable part of our brain, but it tends to be extremely focused on what we need to be fearful or afraid of. Directly on the other side of our brain, is the right emotional brain and the right thinking brain, which allows us to feel much gratitude for simply being alive. It isn’t tied to the past, but is very much in the present moment.

How We Can Move from Feeling Ungrateful to Feeling Grateful Using Our Brains

The key to being able to experience gratitude lies in what Dr. Bolte Taylor calls the “brain huddle.“ In the brain huddle you get in touch with all four parts of your brain, which include the left, thinking brain, the left emotion, the right thinking brain, and the right emotional brain. You appreciate each of these parts, and decide at any given moment, which part of your brain you are going to allow to lead at any given time. Often times the left emotional brain is making a lot of noise, and the idea is to have some way to address its need for comfort of some sort, but also to focus on the other parts and what they need to be able to do in any given situation. When you’re confronted with something that is positive, happy, or fortunate, you can choose to engage the right emotional brain and right thinking brain and express thanks in any given moment.

What to Do If Gratitude Continues to Elude You

First of all, I heartily recommend everyone read Jill Bolte-Taylor‘s book. If you struggle in being able to quiet your emotional left brain part, I have several techniques that can help you to be able to settle that part of your brain down enough so that you can be more successful in trying something like the “brain huddle“ mentioned above. I’ve helped many of my clients to empower the rest of their brains to be able to help them live more fulfilling lives in my 14 years of work in the field. I urge you to call the number at the top of the page or fill out an inquiry form below, and I will get back to you as soon as I can to schedule a free 20 minute phone consult where you can ask questions, and have a better idea about whether I can help you or not. It’s your brain, and it’s your life… Don’t waste another minute, not being able to live your life as fully as you want to!

Visit our page on anxiety therapy to find out more about how Scott can help you feel more gratitude.  

About the author:  Scott Kampschaefer, LCSW is a private practice therapist in Frederick, Maryland.  He has an extensive background in working with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder at a clinic for older adults with these disorders in Austin, Texas.  He now works with adults and adolescents 14 and up in private practice. His most recent book is titled The 5 Pillars of Addiction Recovery and is available for purchase on Amazon and in paperback on this website.