Do you often find yourself caught up in a tangle of anxiety-producing thoughts that you can’t seem to break out of? Would you like a way to quell the anxiety and/or troublesome thoughts that beguile you much of the time? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then I urge you to read on to find out more about how to break out of this vicious cycle through reparenting yourself.

Parenting Issues Growing Up Lead to the Need to Reparent Yourself

When you were very young, your ability to feel secure depended on having one or more parent figures that gave you a sense of stability and security. Much of the time, we grew up with parents or other caregivers who, for whatever reason, were unable or incapable of providing us with this sense of security and stability. Much of our modern day life has been so consumed with distractions, that we invariably were unable to get this from our primary caregivers growing up. This is becoming increasingly the case with the advent of technology and the like. So, when you have anxiety, it is typically a reflection of something that went wrong at an early age.  That, in turn, makes reparenting yourself a necessary task.

Reparenting Yourself is Based on Solid Brain Science

Anxiety comes from a part of our brain that is the place where all of the bad, sad, and disturbing memories are stored. It is a very old part of your brain, and also tends to be the focal point of much negative thinking, too. The good news is there are two other parts of your brain which are good for being able to offer you reassurance so that these thoughts and feelings can be quieted. Those two parts are the left thinking brain, and the right thinking brain. It is the left emotional brain which creates your anxiety, but you can focus on the part of yourself that is able to plan and carry out your daily duties, as well as the part of your brain that feels connected to everyone, everything, and the universe to reassure us that things will work out regardless of what your anxiety is telling you.  All of this information is in Dr. Jill Bolte-Taylor’s book Whole Brain Living, which serves as an excellent guide for how to use your brain to reparent yourself.

‘Huddle Up’ for Reparenting to Overcome Anxiety

In my previous blog post, I talked about the book mentioned above. It gives a description of the four parts of the brain, as well as laying out a roadmap for being able to get in touch with all four parts of your brain in order to be able to cope with virtually all of life’s difficulties. When your anxiety is starting to ramp up, the idea is to call the ‘brain huddle,’ and to take a pause so that the part of you that feels anxious, which is the left emotional brain, can get support from other parts of your brain. Again, the two main parts are your left thinking brain, and your right thinking brain. These are where positive, assuring forces are stored in terms of the part of your brain that can plan out and carry out complex tasks. The other part, the right thinking brain, is very good at allowing you to focus on God, the universe, and your connection to other things and people. Neither of those two parts of our brain knows fear, and the right thinking brain is very valuable in reassuring the left emotional brain that you will be alright.  In this way the reparenting is achieved in an effective and lasting way.  

What If You Continue to Struggle with Reparenting Yourself Through Anxiety?

Many times people need professional help to overcome the effects of anxiety in their lives. I’ve been helping my clients for the entirety of my social work career to recover from anxiety. I can assure you that it is something that can be improved and recovered from given the right support and guidance. I can help you learn about the different parts of your brain, and how they each play a pivotal role in reparenting yourself from anxious thoughts and feelings. I encourage you to call the number at the top of the page, or fill out an inquiry form below, and I can get back to you to schedule a free 20 minute phone consultation. That can give you a better idea of whether I can help you with your particular form and experience of anxiety. I encourage you to summon up the courage to reach out for help, whether it is me, or some other trusted friend, or professional. You deserve to live a life that is free of fear and anxiety!

Visit our page on anxiety therapy to find out more about how Scott can help you reparent yourself.  

About the author:  Scott Kampschaefer, LCSW is a private practice therapist in Frederick, Maryland.  He has an extensive background in working with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder at a clinic for older adults with these disorders in Austin, Texas.  He now works with adults and adolescents 14 and up in private practice. His most recent book is titled The 5 Pillars of Addiction Recovery and is available for purchase on Amazon and in paperback on this website.