I recently had the pleasure of listening to a couple of Brene Brown’s new podcast episodes. Her new series Unlocking Us is something everyone who is affected by our current circumstances needs to listen to.
Who’s Affected by Grief and How Unlocking Us Addresses It
Something changed when Covid-19 hit in our society. All of the sudden we went from being socially open to socially distanced, going wherever we wanted whenever we wanted to now weighing every trip outside the home as a risk to our health. In at least 2 of Brene Brown’s Unlocking Us first few episodes she addresses these issues point blank: one in her first episode and another in an interview with grief expert David Kessler. I consider the collective sense of loss we are all experiencing as a form of grief, as a culture and all over the world. On the podcast, they talked about this sense of loss that each person is experiencing in their own way. You either recognize it’s happening or you don’t, but that doesn’t mean it’s not happening to you.
What Are the Signs of the Grief?
They are the same as the symptoms of any grief reaction: sadness, anger, guilt, depression, tearfulness, anxiety, denial, and sleep disturbance, just to name a few. The difference here is that instead of this happening just to you, it’s happening to everybody else, too! You won’t experience in just the same way as someone else in your life, but that doesn’t make it any less real. The main thing is that we are all going through this together, which makes it possible that we can help and support each other through this.
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What Do Brene and David Kessler Suggest to Treat Grief
One thing Brene talked about in her first podcast that I liked a lot had to do with what was called a ‘Family Gap Plan.’ This involved each member of the family giving a reading on how much energy they each had at any given time, both emotional and physical. Based on this they knew how much to expect of each other. If I have 40% of my total energy and you have 20%, then I will try to pick up some of the slack you otherwise would have put into family chores or attentiveness, or whatever. Another idea that came out of Brene’s discussion with David Kessler had to do with trying to keep the focus on being supportive of each other and kind to each other. Since we are all experiencing grief, then we need to treat each other with as much kindness and compassion as we can muster. If one of us is feeling shame about anything we are going through, then empathy is the key to dispelling this, as Brene has pointed out in her research on the emotion of shame in her previous works.
What My Role is in Helping with Grief
I have been working with clients for over 10 years now as a clinical social worker in overcoming the effects of grief and loss in their lives, especially many older adults who have had serial losses in their lives along with complicated grief. No matter how you are experiencing the Covid-19 crisis in terms of an individual grief reaction, I can assure you that you deserve support in getting through this. I have a number of ways to help you deal with your own experience of grief over the life-changing effects of this crisis, both now and into the future. Going it alone is a thing of the past, as we are now so interconnected in ways too numerous to count. No matter how your grief is expressing itself, you can count on my clinical experience and the tools I can help equip you with to deal with it. I encourage you to call me at the number above, or to fill out the form below for a free 20-minute phone consultation to get a better idea of whether you can benefit from my help. Something like this may only happen once in a lifetime, but you don’t have to wait to get the help you need. It will help not only you, but all the lives you touch as well!
Visit our page on grief counseling to learn more about how Scott can help you with grief and loss.
About the author: Scott Kampschaefer, LCSW is a private practice therapist in Frederick, Maryland. He has an extensive background in working with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder at a clinic for older adults with these disorders in Austin, Texas. He now works with adults and adolescents 14 and up in private practice. His e-book is entitled Life’s Lessons from the Young and the Old and is available for purchase on Amazon.